"FEE bee"

Love

2012-02-16T17:58:00.005-06:00

I was laying on my bed thinking of the goodness of God and I just thought of his love.

Man.. Isn't He such a loving God?

I mean.. to love someone whom you've already known for years, it's so not easy. The more you know a person, the more difficult it is for you to love that person.

I think it's just incredible how God could love me still. He even loves anyone that had betrayed him, hated him, still betraying, or still hating him.

The Bible always mentions about love. One of the verses that came into my mind was 1 Corinthians 13. It talks about the what love really is and the greatness of love.

1 Corinthians 13 - (NIV)

"¹ If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. ² If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. ³ If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.
⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. ⁸ Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. ⁹ For we know in part and we prophesy in part, ¹⁰ but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. ¹¹When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. ¹² For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
¹³ And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."

*p/s: Try replacing the word "love" with "God"! (Fun!) :D

I think to say that I love someone, is to say that "I'm willing to love you even though you're unlovely".

Source: Google image

Also note that love is not just about the romance, love is not just about flirting, love is not about what can you get out of it.

Love is serving one another, giving your best to others, love is giving up what's really important to you to those who need them the most, love is giving to those who are "undeserved".

Food for thought: Love one another, love the enemy, love the "unworthy".

p/p/s: I have a lot more LOVEY DOVEY stuff about God that I want to share!! Stay tune! :D

God bless you!
Jesus LOVES you!

Turn Your Eyes

2012-02-06T00:06:00.002-06:00

Just a few days ago, I activated my Facebook account for 5 minutes. A sudden rush of indescribable-evil-feeling creeped all over my body. I knew I couldn't take it anymore. I don't want to go back to the same old Phoebe, who loves to show off all that she has. I know it killed me spiritually. Although I'm not exactly sure what it is but I definitely know it's that kind of feeling I don't wish to have. Whether it is jealousy or pride, I don't want that no more.

Pastor Amy talked about "Intimacy with God and with Others" this morning. She had reminded me why I deactivated my Facebook account at the first place. I wanted to fix my relationship with God. Guess what? I did it!

For me, it wasn't about managing my time well or spare some time for God despite having a Facebook account. It was more of like I needed to withdraw myself from the world. I needed to stop trying to find love from other people. I needed to stop wanting people's attentions. I needed God's love. I needed God's attention.

I loved how Pastor Amy put it, "You're not changed by the technologies (Facebook etc); you're changed in the presence of God!"

Have you ever realized that the more you spend time with someone, the more you'd be like that someone? I think it works the same way with God too! The more time you spend with God, the more you'd understand Him, and eventually, be like Him too! :)

I had the thought of activating my Facebook account again someday but not now. I know I'm not ready for all the "commotions" yet. I know I need more of God in my life. I still need Him to fix me!

Before the service ended, God just told me this.. "Seek ME with all you heart and you will find me."

**If you think that God is speaking to you, don't reject Him anymore! Wherever you are right now just say hi to Him and start pouring out your heart to Him! He will surely be there with you.

God bless you. :)

Fear NOT!

2012-02-03T00:42:00.000-06:00

So I went to life group tonight, as usual, and.. I like the message a lot. As you can read from the title, it was about "fears" in serving the Lord. Matthew 14:22-33 was used for the lesson and it's basically about Jesus walking on water.

Source: Google Image

I like how Melanie represented the boat, where the disciples were at, as our comfort zones. I believe many of us are too afraid to step out of our comfort zones into serving Jesus. At least for me that is true. I'm always afraid of how people would judge me for being a hypocrite and what-not. However, when I start to understand more about God's grace and love, the more I don't care about what people have to say.

Of course I'm not perfect in my walk with God and I never will. Yet, this is what God's grace is all about. To stand up again when you fall each time. To say to God that you will not give up just because of some dumb mistakes you've made.

I understand it may feel like I'm taking God for granted, however, it's not about how perfect I can be! It's all about how do I apply God's grace and love into my life!

I like what Ps. Creflo Dollars said in his sermon, (something like...) "When you're in heaven, you'd be thinking about 3 things. 1st, you'd be surprised by the people who made it to heaven. 2nd, you'd be surprised by the people who didn't make it to heaven. And 3rd, you'd thank God that you've made it to heaven!"

The bottom line is.. Do not be afraid to serve the Lord!

God bless you!

p/s: You could start by sharing to the people around you why do you think Jesus is awesome! :)

2012-01-21T08:54:00.001-06:00

God, my strength.

2012-01-18T22:27:00.001-06:00

I was quite depressed over the past few days. I don't know why. (Maybe I'm a girl. Girls are emotional, sometimes!) Maybe I'm overwhelmed the amount of readings, assignments, and tests that I need to go through this semester. However, after talking to God about my feelings and reading a few Bible verses, I feel so much better now. Psalm 42:11 says it all. It describes exactly how I feel.

"Why are you down in the dumps, dear soul?

Why are you crying the blues?

Fix my eyes on God -

soon I'll be praising again.

He puts a smile on my face.

He is my God."
(Psalm 42:11)- Message version

I really wanted to give up on the dreams that God has put in me. Yet, God promises me that He will sustain me and provide the best for me. I believe He will do the same for all of you too! God bless you!

"Blessed is God, Israel's God,

always, always, always.

Yes. Yes. Yes."

(Psalm 41:13)- Message version

God is bigger!

2012-01-10T23:34:00.001-06:00

So, I watched Veggie Tales the other night. (Hey, who says it's for kids!) I've learned this song called "God is bigger". Unfortunately, the original version of the song is not available in YouTube. I like this song because it reminded me of how big my God is! :) The lyrics go like this...

God is bigger than the boogie man.
He's bigger than Godzilla,
or the monsters on TV.
Oh, God is bigger than the boogie man.
And He's watching out for you and me.

I believe my God is not only bigger than boogie man, Godzilla or the monsters on TV. My God is definitely bigger than my problems in life. It is difficult to have to trust God when days are not going well but it is definitely worth the try to hang on to God. We gotta have child-like faith when it comes to trusting God! DO NOT GIVE UP!! :)

p/s: Hey readers, if you need someone to pray for you, feel free to drop by your prayer requests on the comment section or you could email it to me at: phoebelwy_92@hotmail.com

p/p/s: Visit Veggie Tales online for more cool stories about Jesus! :D

Dreams

2012-01-02T13:44:00.000-06:00

I have a lot of dreams.

I always dream that...

I could be a worship leader,

I could impact my family and friends' lives,

I could excel in my studies,

I could meet my "ideal husband",

I could stay beautiful,

I could eat all that I want and never get fat,

I could own a fancy house and car,

I could love Jesus more and more each day,

I could overcome the temptations in life,

I could be joyful all day,

and a lot more!

It seems so impossible to have all of that, isn't it?

If you are just like me, having a lot of wonderful dreams in your heart, I want you to know that NOTHING is impossible with God! God will fulfill all the dreams that you have in your heart. All these dreams are in your heart for a purpose. God wants to bless you! God wants to give you the best in life!

But how? How are we going to get all these?

The answer is pretty easy... Seek not for the BLESSINGS, but for the BLESS-ER!

Most of my dreams have been fulfilled just because I put my trust in the Lord and I never give up on Him even when times are tough! Do not give up, my friends! Do not let your emotions or circumstances determine who God is! God is still good despite what you're going through. He knows exactly what He is doing. Let's work together in building God's kingdom in this new year!

Jesus loves you! :)

Above all

2011-12-24T13:41:00.000-06:00

I love to think of the Lord in a very different way. I love to think that He loves me so so much. I love to think of Him as the One I could go to whenever I have no one else. My goal in writing this post is that I want everybody to know that my God is not just another God. His love is beyond all of us could ever imagine. Where in this world can I find such loving God? Who in this world could put a smile on my face even when times are tough? I couldn't be more grateful to have my God be the Lord of my life. :)

For those of you who are feeling depressed, I want you know that there is a God who loves you and wants to turn your life around.
For those of you who are seeking for love or just someone who would appreciate you, I want you know that there is a God who really cares.
For those of you who are wanting to give up on God, I want you to know that Jesus is the best gift you'll ever have in life. Do not give up on Him!

Jesus loves you! All of you! :)

2011-12-24T13:28:00.001-06:00

2011-12-24T13:24:00.001-06:00

2011-12-04T14:31:00.000-06:00

He is right after all

2011-11-20T22:22:00.001-06:00

Hi all. I'm still well and alive. I've been really busy dealing with school-stuff. It is definitely not high school anymore! Well.. I'm here, of course, to continue to speak/write of God's goodness and faithfulness.

I am just so so blessed. From the time I got to the States until now, God has been changing me from the inside out. I've learnt to depend on God a little bit more. I've learnt to trust God more. I've learnt a little bit more about God's grace. I just can't put into words on all the things God has been doing in my life. I am too grateful for having a God like Him. :')

I wouldn't say that I'm living a flawless life but I would say that I've learnt to have abundance joy in me even during the toughest time. I have no idea why things happen most of the time, however, I believe that everything will turn out to be fine when I have God by my side. He is having the bigger picture of my life anyway. :)

I would like to share a Bible verse, which I think it's pretty interesting, here.

2 Timothy 2:11-13 (Message version)

"This is a sure thing: If we die with him, we'll live with him;

If we stick it out with him, we'll rule with him;

If we turn our backs on him, he'll turn his back on us;

If we give up on him, he does not give up- for there's no way he can be false to himself."

When I read that over and over again, I get the assurance from God that He will never give up on me, EVER! I like how the last part of the verse says, "for there's no way he can be false to himself".

Have you ever feel like you're right about something, even if everybody disagrees with you, you will somehow stand strong and say that you're right? Well.. It's pretty clear to me that God is the same.

He is right when He says we are precious to Him.

He is right when He chose to be with us.

He is right when He says He will bless us no matter how sinful we are.

He is right when He says we are more than conquerors.

He is always true to Himself and to us.

You might feel like "where is God?" all the time. But when you allow God to move in your life, He will do it. I like how Joyce Meyer put it, "When you think God is not doing anything, that is when God is doing the most in your life!"

Jesus loves you! :)

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Receive

2011-11-01T10:47:00.000-05:00

Love like Christ

2011-10-15T12:51:00.000-05:00

"so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father..." (Colossians 1:10-12)

I've been asking God to fill His love in my heart. I want to love like Him. However, God reminded me to first love Him. But I really have no idea how to love God. I love Him. I know that. Yet, I know I'm not loving Him as much as I love my homework or grades. So I prayed for a heart that will love Him no matter what and the verses above just came to me like BOOM! I will break it down a little.

1. To love God is to "live a life worthy of the Lord" (Col 1:10)
I was asking myself as I read this over and over again. "Have I been living a life that is worthy of the Lord?" Living a life that is worthy of the Lord simply means you have been taking every day of your life seriously. Are you wasting your life by going to parties and get tipsy? God has sent His only son Jesus Christ to died for you and I as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. This sacrifice is more than anything the world could give. We could show that we appreciate God's sacrifice by just living a life worthy of Him.

Food for thought: Have we been living our days knowing that our days are worth every drop of His blood? Have we laid down our works just to do His?

2. To love God is to "please him in every way" (Col 1:10)
Honestly, sometimes pleasing God is easy to be said than done. To please God is to die to your bad habits and obviously stop sinning. It is difficult as I said because we are humans. Humans sin almost all the time. I should know that. Been there, done that. But you know what.. NOTHING is impossible when we turn our focus to Jesus. When I'm tempted to sin, I will calm myself down, close my eyes, and think about the Lord. I will think about how He has died for me. Sometimes it will work too as I think about all the heavenly beings that are looking down at me. (This is kind of creepy yet surreal at the same time. Haha.)

*God knows what you are doing in the "dark"! Boo! :)

3. To love God is to grow "in the knowledge of God" (Col 1:10)
Why are there people who hate God? Have you ever thought about that? The answer is pretty simple: They have no idea WHO God is! I mean, how can you say you love a person when you don't even know the person thoroughly? This is the same in loving God. One thing I've learnt lately is that the more that I know God, the more that I love Him. The more that I understand God, the more that I love Him. How can I know or understand God more? By reading the Bible and pray. Christianity is not a religion, it's a relationship. (Some might have heard it before like ten thousand times but I think it's still true) This relationship with God is not just a one-way thing but two-way! You cannot expect God to do anything if you don't even ask or talk to Him. Although God knows everything but the main point of going to Him is to build a relationship with Him.

p/s: I'm still working on this! Let's build our relationship with God together! :)

At last, Paul said this "..being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father.." (Col 1:11-12).

Many times, we will find it super difficult to "live a life worthy of the Lord" or to please God in every way or even to take out some of our precious time to know God better. However, Paul said when we approach to the Lord with our flaws and weaknesses, God will strengthen us so that we could have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father.

Jesus LOVES you. :)

Lukewarm

2011-10-11T11:28:00.000-05:00

I love this particular chapter in Francis Chan's "Crazy Love". This chapter called "Profile of The Lukewarm" talks about how Christians actually think they're saved when they're not living a life that pleases God. They take God's grace for granted. I would like to share some of Francis' points about who lukewarm people are. Buy "Crazy Love" for the complete version of this chapter! :)

LUKEWARM PEOPLE attend church fairly regularly. It is what is expected of them, what they believe "good Christians" do, so they go.

LUKEWARM PEOPLE give money to charity and to the church...as long as it doesn' impinge on their standard of living. If they have a little extra and it is easy and safe to give, they do so. After all, God loves a cheerful giver, right?

LUKEWARM PEOPLE tend to choose what is popular over what is right when they are in conflict. They desire to fit in both at church and outside of church; they care more about what people think of their actions (like attendance and giving) than what God thinks of their hearts and lives.

LUKEWARM PEOPLE don't really want to be saved from their sin; they want only to be saved from the penalty of their sin. They don't genuinely hate sin and aren't truly sorry for it; they're merely sorry because God is going to punish them. Lukewarm people don't really believe that this new life Jesus offers is better than the old sinful one.

LUKEWARM PEOPLE are moved by stories about people who do radical things for Christ, yet they do not act. They assume such action is for "extreme" Christians, not average ones. Lukewarm people call "radical" what Jesus expected of all His followers.

LUKEWARM PEOPLE rarely share their faith with their neighbors, coworkers, or friends. They do not want to be rejected, nor do they want to make people uncomfortable by talking about private issues like religion.

LUKEWARM PEOPLE gauge their morality or "goodness" by comparing themselves to the secular world. They feel satisfied that while they aren't as hard-core for Jesus as so-and-so, they are nowhere as horrible as the guy down the street.

LUKEWARM PEOPLE love God, but they do not love Him with all their heart, soul, and strength. They would be quick to assure you that they try to love God that much, but that sort of total devotion isn't really possible for the average person; it's only for pastors and missionaries and radicals.

LUKEWARM PEOPLE love others but do not seek to love others as much as they love themselves. Their love of others id typically focused on those who love them in return, like family, friends, and other people they know and connect with. There is little love left over for those who cannot love them back, much less for those who intentionally slight them, whose kids are better than athletes than theirs, or with whom conversations are awkward or comfortable. Their love is highly conditional and very selective, and generally comes with strings attached.

LUKEWARM PEOPLE will serve God and others, but there are limits to how far they will go or how much time, money, energy they are willing to give.

LUKEWARM PEOPLE think about life on earth much more often than eternity in heaven. Daily life is mostly focused on today's to-do-list, this week's schedule, and next month's vacation. Rarely, if ever, do they intently consider the life to come.

LUKEWARM PEOPLE are thankful for their luxuries and comforts, and rarely consider trying to give as much as possible to the poor. They are quick to point out, "Jesus never said money is the root of all evil, only that the love of money is." Untold numbers of lukewarm people feel "called" to minister to the rich; very few feel "called" to minister to the poor.

LUKEWARM PEOPLE do whatever is necessary to keep themselves from feeling guilty. They want to do the bare minimum, to be "good enough" without it requiring too much of them.

LUKEWARM PEOPLE are continually concerned with playing it safe; they are slaves to the god of control. This focus on safe living keeps them from sacrificing and risking for God.

LUKEWARM PEOPLE feel secure because they attend church, made a profession of faith at age twelve, were baptized, come from a Christian family, vote Republican, or live in America. Just as the prophets in the Old Testament warned Israel, so we are not safe just because we wear the label Christian or because some people persist in calling us a "Christian nation."

LUKEWARM PEOPLE do not live by faith; their lives are structured so they never have to. They don't have to trust God if something unexpected happens - they have their saving account. They don't need God to help them - they have their retirement plan in place. They don't genuinely seek out what life God would have them live - they have life figured and mapped out. They don't depend on God on a daily basis - their refrigerators are full and, for the most part, they are good in health. The truth is, their lives wouldn't look much different if they suddenly stopped believing in God.

LUKEWARM PEOPLE probably drink and swear less than average, but besides that, they really aren't very different from your typical unbeliever. They equate their partially sanitized lives with holiness, but they couldn't be more wrong.

So so real

2011-10-07T17:29:00.001-05:00

If someone were to ask me why would I think that God is real, I would say because...

1. God answers my prayers.
I've been praying for my high school friend for some time now. I used to think that it is just super impossible for her to get to know Christ. But I pray for her anyway. And guess what.. She's now starting to acknowledge that there might be a God. That's a good start.

2. God reveals himself to me.
As I spend more and more time with God, He shows me what is it like to be in His presence. The more that I seek Him, the more I feel His love and warmth. This kind of love and warmth can never ever be found in anybody but Jesus.

3. God assures me His love every day.
I used to feel so empty and wonder where my leaders got the joy every day. I understand now. As I look upon the Lord in everything that I do, I have that satisfaction and joy in me. I want to spend every single day with the Lord. When people around me stressed me out, God is always there to tell me that He loves me and will take care of everything for me.

The most privilege thing in life for me is to be able to walk with Jesus every single day.

"W.D.Baggage"

2011-10-02T16:19:00.000-05:00

Monday

2-3 pages essay

History test (5 chapters - short answers and essay)

Wednesday

Math quiz

4 pages essay

So I went to Breakaway, a retreat by Chi Alpha, and there's only ONE word to describe it.

AWESOME!

I was excited about going to the retreat but I was carrying a "baggage" with me. This baggage contained all my worries and doubts. I mean, how could I go for a retreat when I have so many things due the coming week. I must be crazy. But you know what.. I went and I thank God for His assurance that He will take care of me when I put Him first in life.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30

God took away my "baggage" as I spent the weekend with Him at the retreat. I'm not worried anymore about whether will I get a perfect score for my History or essay. I know God will do His thing, which means more testimonials to share to all of you and my life is just going to get more exciting!

Do remember me in your prayers.

Jesus loves you!

Never Let Me Go

2011-09-23T20:22:00.000-05:00

"You know what... Today I'm not going to read the Bible the first thing I wake up. I will leave it until tonight. I will not make my bed. I'm not going to do the laundry. I'm too tired for all these. I have too much on my mind. Hmph!"

Source: Google image

(Eating mini sausages happily while watching Day Star)

"You have to read God's words! If you don't understand, ask the Holy Spirit to help you to understand! Do not harden your hearts!" said a preacher on the TV screen.

"Not again.."

Yup.. The preacher in the TV spoke to me again.

Well actually, God spoke to me through that preacher.

God knew I was trying to hide from Him. He knew I was throwing tantrums at Him.

I was really tired. I've never ever tried so hard to get so close to Jesus.

God promised us that if we draw near to Him, He will draw near to us. (James 4:8) He really did.

I thought I was the only one who was trying so hard to make our relationship (Jesus and I) work but when I stopped trying, He tried every possible ways to keep me with Him.

"I will never leave you nor forsake you." (Hebrews 13:5)

Just like the other day, I ran to my room, leaving all the dishes on the sink. "I want read God's word now!" I thought. "Hurmm.. Which book to read.. Urm.. (Looking through the contents of the Bible) Hebrews it is!"

"Today, if you hear his voice,

do not harden your hearts

as you did in the rebellion..."

(Hebrews 3:7-8)

"For the word of God is living and active.

Sharper than any double-edged sword..."

(Hebrews 4:12)

"For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses,

but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are - yet was without sin."

(Hebrews 4:15)

Actually the whole chapter 4 of Hebrews spoke to me. I just want to share the three particular verses above to all of you. :)

Anyway, the whole point of this post is to let you know that there is a God who cares for you and wants to have a relationship with you. Many times I feel that God isn't by my side or that He doesn't even care but the truth is, He has always been by my side.

The minute when I stopped trying, that was when He started to show up.

I love you, Jesus. :')

Praise

2011-09-19T20:50:00.001-05:00

I used to critique on my mom's cooking a lot. If the dishes don't taste as good, I would show the "yucky-face" and well, say "YUCKS"! I didn't understand why must I say it tastes good when it's not!

So today I cooked pasta for my brother, Katie, and Tim. After hearing the praises from Katie and Tim, I felt a kind of satisfaction with a little motivation to want to cook more for others. I finally know how does it feels like to be praised, even though I think my pasta was not as good as my mom's.

Lesson to learn: Praise your mom's cooking even though sometimes they are not "edible". LOL.

p/s: Of course my brother said the pasta seemed a little tasteless.. He's my brother! Owhhh Wells....

Jesus Loves You! All of You!!

Tiny lil' thang

2011-09-16T23:21:00.001-05:00

Why do we think that we are so big and great?
Why do we have pride?

I don't know.

Watch the video above and you'll get what I meant.

Be blessed.

"Wonder-FULL"

2011-09-11T15:57:00.001-05:00

THE GUY IN THE TV JUST SPOKE TO ME!

Well, kind of.

So there I was, on the couch having my mac and cheese with a pastor named Joel something on the screen. "Interesting sermon" I thought. He talked about meditate on God's promises, something like that. I was like, "Yeah.. I guess I've been letting negative thoughts into my mind lately." (Which kind of giving me this failure-kind-of-feeling lately) I didn't realize that God was speaking to me.

Not until the next man with a Jewish-clothing appeared on the screen and started talking about Jesus. He said that how we are supposed to have relationship with God and yadayada. (I was like okay I know that)
"Many times, when people are in trouble, they will try to call up their friends to talk about their problem. They never think of going to God. C'mon, we should be led by the Spirit!" (That's roughly what I remember)

Okay. THAT. is. freaky.

Last night I was thinking, "Oh God.. My life is so sad yadayadayada... Why is God not talking to me?!! I need someone to talk to!!" I text some friends, guess what, I got no reply from them. Even if they did it was too late to "mend my broken heart". So I went to bed.

" 'Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,' says the Lord Almighty. " (Zechariah 4:6)

But you know what, God loves me so much and He actually spoke to me today like through the TV! (Through that Jewish-look-guy) Quickly, I ran into the room and talked to God. He actually said to me, "Have you forgotten how great and almighty I am?" And He reminded me of all the great things He had done for me. (': Of course he promised me that He will not stop doing greater things in my life.

I'm so so grateful to have a God like Him. A God who actually cares and finds ways to make sure I get His message. (: Praise the Lord.

"Impossible-est"

2011-09-07T23:13:00.003-05:00

I don't know how to put this in words but God is really beyond awesome. So I had no idea at all on how to finish up my three-pages long of essay which was due today. (basically I had less than a day to write that and I'm very slow when it comes to writing) I didn't even know how to start off the essay and obviously no idea how to end it. I was so tired that I couldn't even think. I'm sure all of you know that kind of "I-need-to-sleep-but-I-haven't-finish-up-my-work" feeling. Yeap.. I was in that position. Anyway, I prayed "God, I know I shouldn't have done my work last minute. But but.. Could you help me pleaseeee....?" :) Then I went to sleep. When I woke up this morning and sat right in front of the laptop while staring at the blank pages on the screen, all of the sudden ideas popped into my "half-awake" brain. I started to type as if there'd be no tomorrow. Man... Don't you love how God always come out of nowhere. In His world, there is no such word as "impossible-est"!! How cool is that right... I know! Bhahaha.. Just want to thank God for his goodness.

Let's sing together..

♫ So good so so good to me.. So good so so good to me, Jesus.. ♫

Determination

2011-09-03T00:11:00.001-05:00

I know I'm not supposed to brag about how good I am. However, I really think that I am good in this particular area. (MUAHAHA) As you can read from the title of this post, I have a really strong determination. I am not talking about the ordinary determination in my studies or whatsoever. It is actually the determination to believe that God exists and that He loves me so so much. Even though after so many times of failing to be faithful to Him. Technically, I'm supposed to walk away from Him because I'm supposed to feel ashamed of my behavior but I am still with Jesus until TODAY! Can you believe that? Yeah, i know.

Of course there are times where the devil will try to snatch me away by telling me that God will never forgive me or that God will condemn me, which is a total LIE! So, this is the thing I am really proud of myself. Bhahaha.. :D (Just thought of sharing this to all of you. Yeap yeap..)

p/s: NEVER EVER GIVE UP ON JESUS! NO MATTER WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, HE WILL FORGIVE YOU AND WILL BE THERE FOR YOU!

Raindrops

2011-08-29T22:21:00.001-05:00

Bread of Life

2011-08-28T16:45:00.006-05:00

"I must study History whenever I have the time to do so."

(Planning my timetable)

"Okay. 2hours for History. Owh snap.. I have to finish up all my homework before reading History. Okay.. Another hour for History after dinner.. .."

"Owh.. An hour for God. Alright.. Perfect timetable ever!"

You know what.... That is not even the perfect timetable at all. In fact, it's the worst timetable I've ever had.

"Do not work for food that spoils, but for food that endures to eternal life, which the Son of Man will give you." (John 6:27)

I was too worried about my grades. I would make sure that I study as much as I could. I wanted to prove to others that I could do well in my studies.

I even had the thought of giving God just an hour of my day. Sometimes, I would say, not even an hour but 30minutes. I thought as long as I have spent time with God, I'm fine.

Honestly, I'm not fine. I've worn out.

"Be still, and know that I am God." (Psalms 46:10)

I have totally forgotten that my God is omnipotent.

I've been living my life as if my God is dead or that my God is not able to do great and mighty things in my life.

I have let all the worries in life to blind me for a moment.

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given unto you as well." (Matthew 6:33)

"Then Jesus declared, "I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty." (John 6:35)

God has reminded me that He is faithful and still in control of my life.

He has planned beautiful things for me. He will definitely not fail me. He loves me and wants the best for me. (Say this to yourself repeatedly if you have to!) :D

I believe God has all that wonderful plans for all of you too.

God bless you.

Food for thought: Are we giving our best to God?

Risk

2011-08-24T00:46:00.003-05:00

"Jesus risked everything for you!" - Ps. Nick @ Latenite.

As Ps. Nick was saying that, I started to think about what have I risked for Jesus. And this was what came into my mind..

From the left side of the front row in the class, the girl started to introduce herself. We were supposed to say our name, where do we call home, and something interesting about ourself. (When this "self-introductory" went around, I had few minutes to think about what one interesting about me that I wanted to say.) After the girl beside me ended her introduction, it was my turn.

"Hi, my name is Phoebe. I'm from Malaysia and I LOVE JESUS!"

Okay.. I didn't say that, sadly. I was trying to save my reputation. (Although I don't really have one.) You see.. Jesus risked His reputation. He is God. He could have just said, "Oh.. I'm God. I don't need to be on that cross to die for these unworthy people down here. I shall sit on my throne and enjoy my grapes." (I don't know if there'll be grapes in heaven but yeah..)

BUT you know what.. He didn't do that. He came. He died. And He rose again. Just for you and I. He risked His reputation as God just for us! How awesome is that right?

Food for thought: Jesus had a reputation as God but He risked it by coming down on earth for all of us. Me on the other hand, I've got no reputation but I was trying so hard to save it. Wow!

Serve

2011-08-20T00:26:00.002-05:00

Lesson of the day: We are called to serve and not to be served. (Matt 20:28)

I would admit that I'm not a big fan of serving people but since I got to Oklahoma, I'm starting to have that tiny bit of heart to want to serve others. ( Maybe it's because now that I have to do all the chores by myself. So I kind of know how my mother has been feeling all along.) It's not easy to do all the work while most of the people are enjoying themselves. But you know what I got out of serving others? I've got the JOY baby! Every night I'll be sleeping with a smiling face like :) that. Well, of course it'd be tired but when you got that joy in your heart, you won't even know what tired is!! So if you're wondering how can I sleep so well every now and then, serving others would be one of my "secrets/tips-to-sleep-well".

God bless.

Everywhere

2011-08-18T17:06:00.003-05:00

As a newcomer in OU, I would say it's pretty tough for me. I mean I have my brother's friends around to help me out but still.. I don't have someone who I can really talk to. I went to help out the freshmen to move in today, hoping that I could make some friends, but I didn't make any. I was kind of like sad for a moment but you know what.. God is always reminding me that I got Him by my side, which is awesome. :) Although I'm kind of lost around here, but I believe God will provide awesome friends for me soon. Can't wait. :D And oh.. I'm having problem enrolling into History class for now. But you know what (again).. I believe God will help me to solve things out soon. Friends, do pray for me, I really need your prayers in times like this. Thanks a lot. God bless..

King of glory

2011-08-13T07:16:00.004-05:00

"Phoebe.. Time to wake up!"

"No way! It's only 3.30 in the morning!"

"Phoebe.. Wake up!"

"What? 4.30am. Seriously, Lord?"

"Phoebe.. Do you know that I always want the best for you? Do you know just how much I love you?"

(yawn) "Yeah.. I know that. I love you too Jesus. I really need to sleep, like now."

"Phoebe.. Just talk to me. You and I know that we need to talk."

(silence)

(tears rolling down my cheeks)

"Lord, I'm just so confused. What should I do? I mean I've tried so many ways. It's really hurting badly inside of me. I talked to you but.."

"You were not listening."

"Yes I did!!"

"Er.. No"

"Er.. Yes!"

(awkward silence)

"okay fine. Maybe i was not listening properly but.."

"Phoebe.. I love you."

"I know. I know. Stop saying that."

"I won't. I love you I love you I love you I love you.."

)':

"Lord, thank you. Thank you so so much. (more tears coming down) I love you too and I will never ever trade you for anything else."

(hugs)

To be able to spend time with God during the middle of night might take away my precious sleeping hours but it is definitely worth it. God had revealed more of His character to me in that 2 hours and had taught me a lot more in boy-girl relationship. I just can't wait to experience more of Him now. And would definitely give away my sleeping hours just to hear from Him again.

Faithfulness

2011-08-11T00:30:00.003-05:00

So, my brother told every friends of his (kind of) that I'm so blessed because from the time I got to OU, everything is done nicely for me. (because my brother is here to go through all the hassles with me) Haha.. Well, I guess he is jealous or something. Hahaha.. Ok. I'm not here to boast about how good and awesome is my brother. (maybe he kind of is.) But I want to boast about how good God is. He has definitely planned everything nicely for me. I didn't understand why must I be in the same university with my brother, but now I do. Muahaha..

God has also been really faithful to me. He never fails to remind me that He is in control of my sickness and that He will hold on to His promise that He WILL heal me. Sometimes I'm easily distracted by the difficulties in life but somehow God will pull me back and set my focus back to Him again. I cannot imagine life without God, like seriously. God is tooooo good to me and I know He has been good to all of you too! Let's run around with arms waving like nobody cares and praise the Lord for He is good! WOOHUU!!

"Even though we're faithless, but God is faithful." - Pastor M.J.

"I love you"

2011-08-04T20:11:00.003-05:00

For some of us it may be easy to say 'I love you'.

'I love you, papa'

'I love you, mama'

'I love you, YOU'

But do we really mean it? Do we feel that "heartbeat" when we say it? Or when we say it a thousand time to someone we love, does 'I love you' means 'I love you' anymore?

I would end with saying 'I love you, Jesus' in every prayer of mine. I didn't know why do I say that. I mean I love Jesus but I didn't have that "heartbeat" when I said it. But now.. When God reveals more of Himself to me, I feel more sincere when I say 'I love you, Jesus'. It's like as if I mean every single word that I've said. Only then I realized, to truly love someone, you'll have to know that someone thoroughly.

Sometimes we'll have that misconception about God, which is why we'll feel intimidated even in God's presence. My advice is that just chill and wait upon the Lord, listen to what He has to say, spend some time gazing upon his glory, rather than babbling about what's-not during our quiet time with Him. And always, ALWAYS remember that God loves you no matter what.

Be blessed. :)

Nomad

2011-08-04T06:43:00.003-05:00

I remember telling my friends that I'm a nomad. My family is too used to moving here and there. Now, I'll be moving again. (Well, kind of.) Maybe that is why leaving Malaysia is not that difficult? I'm really looking forward to what God has prepared for me in the States. Thank God for providing good friends at Malaysia, be it at Sabah or Subang or Seremban. I've been blessed by all of my friends. I believe God will do the same when I'm in US. :) Please do continue to pray for me.

Coooooool

2011-07-28T02:39:00.003-05:00

So I found this at the website of Forever 21...

So cool.... We don't get to see this in Malaysia. (At least I've never seen it before) Mind you, it's available in Forever 21, America that is. Total shock of my life.

Owh.. Jesus loves you! All of YOU!! :)

Passion for Jesus

2011-07-27T09:41:00.004-05:00

"Part of the Christian world has dived headlong into a never-ending cycle of recovery, self-help, and how-to-do-it sermons, books, and tapes. Some of the material is helpful, but most neglect the one important principle: transformation does not come from striving or from psychological techniques alone. Transformation comes from beholding the glory and splendor of Jesus, who is a real Person."

ALIVE!

2011-07-24T21:09:00.002-05:00

I don't remember when's the last time I blogged. But hey.. I'm glad that I'm starting to blog again. :) A lot of things have changed. To the better of course. :) Before I get too excited and start blogging about all the things that God has been doing in my life, I need to do some "cleaning up" to my blog. So.. Yeap. Do drop by my blog later. Like tomorrow or something. :D

God bless.

Hello!

2011-01-28T07:11:00.000-06:00

" My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. "

(2 Corinthians 12:9)

Woohuu!!!

Hallelujah!

2011-01-23T01:26:00.000-06:00

Hi all! I've been facing a lot of 'lemons' lately. (if you know what i mean) I've been through the toughest period of my life in the past few weeks. But I thank the Lord for His faithfulness and love. (: I'm back again and this time with another level up of passion towards God. I'm so excited for the things that He's going to do in my life. I can't wait to see all that miracles to happen! :D And oh.. Question for the day:

Should I start with my own "Christian" blog?

(Or should I continue with this blog without "locking" it?)

Let me know what do you think! :D

More updates coming soon..

2011

2011-01-02T09:57:00.000-06:00

This year is going to be an awesome year! Or is there a word more awesome than awesome? (: There's a lot of things that I would like to share. I just don't know where to start. I will plan it nicely and come back to you guys, soon. (: For now..

HAPPY 2011!!

WOOHUU!!

Love you Jesus. (:

There

2010-12-23T09:54:00.000-06:00

Just when I feel helpless, lonely, stupid, useless and all the negative stuff that you could think of ; God has reminded me that He's always there to love me for who I am. (: And for the very first time, I feel so "useful". I've achieve quite a few things in such a short period of time. I would say that I'm impressed, by myself. :p

Actually things have not been going the way I want them to. I don't know why am I praising the Lord for the things I'm not satisfied with. I just do. (: Whenever I feel like quiting or maybe like just now I almost lose faith in God, God reminded me that He would keep his promises. It's just the matter of time.

"Act on faith, not on feelings. Do what God wants you to do, in spite of your emotions. Don't worry-your feelings will follow. If you act on faith with your emotions, God can help you control all those up-and-down feelings." - anonymous

Obedience

2010-12-21T07:18:00.001-06:00

There are certain things in life we wish that we could know why are they so. For instance, why can't we be naked walking around the mall. (this is kind of a bad example) -.-

What I want to say is that, not everything in life must have reasons behind them. If God wants them to be in His way, please do not ask why. Because in obeying, there is no 'why'. It's either 'yes' or 'no', full stop. Sometimes we couldn't make up our minds on certain things, not because we do not know what is right or wrong, rather, we do not want to make the 'wrong choice' by doing the right thing. (i don't know if this make sense, but yah..)

Noah's ark would be one of the examples on obedience. I'm sure everyone knows about Noah and his ark. If Noah didn't obey God, which is to build the ark, Noah would be dead during the big flood. But because Noah did what God has told him to do, without asking 'why', he survived through the massive flood. (:

Yes, of course, we will get a lot of weird-looking-faces from the people around us. But what the hair, this is how we serve and please God, get use to it! :D

So do not ask 'why why why' but rather 'Lord, what is it that you want me to do?'.

Amen?

WUAH!!

2010-12-18T21:13:00.000-06:00

Sabah trip was awesome. I love the food, the beach, shopping malls, and most of all, my cousins and friends!! :D

I really want to thank God for this trip. And thank my cousins and friends there. I miss you all already! Argh.. =/

I'll definitely go back there again if I have the chance. (:

ilovekk.

iloveJesus.

Oh another quickie update, I CAN PLAY PIANO ALREADY! Well.. Sort of. (: Thank you Isabel and Fiona, my lovely cousins! :D

Oh and.. I'll be getting my Toefl result pretty soon. Should be coming out on the 25th! (yeah i know. "Christmas present" for me.) Ah wells..

And again, thank you, Lord! For every single thing. Really. Am very grateful! :D

Saaabaaah!

2010-12-11T21:02:00.000-06:00

I'll be gone for 5days.

Miss me!

A lot of things are coming up next.

Especially Christmas!!

Teehee..

Wokay. Gotta pack for my Sabah trip now.

Muahahaha.. (:

Owh..

And I thank the Lord for all that He has done.

Hehehehe..

Long story but yah.

Praise the Lord!!

JesusJesusJesus..

2010-12-09T20:15:00.000-06:00

Tomorrow is the day. Nope. Not prepared yet. But I guess I'm mentally and emotionally prepared? Lol. After tomorrow I'll be free as a bird!! :D Do pray for me people! (: I really need God's help. It's like a war to me. Without the presence of God I can't win this war! Owh.. And here's my finals result..

Biology B-

English A

Maths B

Psychology B+

I thought I would fail my Biology. Haha.. But thank God! Whee... I'm not an excellent student I know. But hey.. I'm not that bad too! :p I really cannot stand some of my friends. They got like 3A's 1B but they're not happy with it! Omg.. -.- People, be content with what God has given to you! (: Ok. Time for war now! Teehee...

Obedience to God’s Word is the recipe for spiritual success.

Immanuel

2010-12-08T06:33:00.000-06:00

So I've been practicing for Toefl these few days and I'm so upset by all the careless mistakes I've made throughout the practices. Why can't I get full marks for every practice? It's always 25/30. Thank God for He's so awesome, He actually reminded me who's the one taking control of my life. And that I shouldn't be too worry about anything at all. I can practice all I can, it's still up to God, really. So pray is what I should do. (:

'When God gives us success in any area of our lives, let’s not forget the Source of our success. May we choose humility, for God gives grace to the humble.'

-odb.org

God lifts us high when we choose to live low.

Repent

2010-12-07T05:15:00.000-06:00

'God doesn't comfort us to make us comfortable;

He comforts us to make us comforters.'

- odb.org

So I was watching "7 signs of the apocalypse" this afternoon on the History channel, and I find it rather terrifying. They showed the 7 signs by referring to the last book of the Bible-Revelation, with some scientific researches. All I could say is that, end of the world is beyond our imaginations!

In the show, the researchers or pastors kept on emphasizing "it's just the matter of time". They can't predict when will it be happening. It may be tonight, tomorrow or even few days later. So if you still think that 2012 is where the end of the world would be, think again!

3 more days to Toefl.

Tangled

2010-12-06T02:17:00.000-06:00

Yup, I've watched Tangled!!

I like the characters. (:

So yeap. Here's Tangled's site.

It's a really cool site.

Enjoy!!

*4 days to Toefl!

Pray pray!!

Rejoice!

2010-12-03T21:48:00.000-06:00

I've posted up the testimonials of Janice and Sonia previously and I really want to thank God for that video. It made me realized that I shouldn't be too worried about things in life. Instead, let God be God, He will do whatever He wants when it's time. I cried when I was watching it, feeling grateful yet stupid. (': I really pray that God will touch your heart as you watch their testimonials. Enjoy. (:

(':

2010-12-03T21:44:00.000-06:00

timeofmylife?

2010-12-03T07:24:00.000-06:00

Imsolazytostudyfortoeflalready. ): Backacheshoulderacheheadache. Beenrestingfortwodaysbecauseimjusttoolazytosqueezemybrainjuice.

Ineedtorestmore. okthxbai.

Heaven

2010-12-02T07:35:00.000-06:00

I was there in my dream last night. It was so surreal. Some of you may be laughing at me, but even if it's not real, it means something to me. When I woke up from this dream, I realized there's not much time to waste as we do not know when is He coming back again. He'll come like a thief. (Revelation 16:15) When you have the chance to reach out, go! When you have the chance to share the good news, go! As we glorify God's name, He will boast about us in heaven too! (:

Also, realizing that having to stay in heaven for eternity is something to be fear of. Fear because I have limited time here in this world. Fear because I know if I don't spread the gospel now, I'll regret when I'm in heaven. So when there's an opportunity to share the good news, don't let it pass you by. Grab every opportunity. Share the Word as if today is the last day you'll ever live!

I don't know about you, but for me, I don't want to have regrets when I'm in heaven. (:

*Don't ever say "i'm not capable", because no one is capable. That is why we need God!

**Do not say "wait laahh.. still got time." "wait laahh.. wait until i have a chance." THERE'S NO TIME TO WASTE PEOPLE! NO TIME!

I know you too

2010-11-30T03:53:00.000-06:00

Do you know that the devil is trying so hard to break us down everyday, every second? Do you know that the devil knows our weaknesses so well that sometimes, some of us would just fall into his trap? Do you know Mr. S. A. Tan is waiting for the right time to make sure he could take a foot step into our lives?

I know some of my friends who are not aware of the work of the devil. They might be still new in the family, which is why I'm feeling so helpless right now. I can't do anything to stop them. I'm sure they would think like, "well phoebe, you're not any better than us." But I just want to help. =/ I know all that I could do right now is to just pray and pray. I believe prayer works!! (:

Of course I've been facing the same problem as well. Many times, the devil would play the "mind game" with me. For example, "Phoebe, you're not good enough." "Phoebe, hate those who hate you!" "Phoebe, your family sucks." "Phoebe, you don't have to pray or read the Bible." "Phoebe, stop praying, it's not working."

see that face of victory?!!

But you know what devil, I know all your tricks. I know all your lies. I'm not buying it and I will never ever trust you. It's really difficult for me to be a perfect girl but I have my wonderful and powerful God with me. I'm not afraid of you! :D In fact, those lies would make me stronger! You think you know me that well? Guess what? I KNOW YOU TOO!! Boo you devil! :p

Powerful

2010-11-29T09:56:00.000-06:00

uglaayyy...

I'm a person who would give in easily. I'm just weak and helpless. Also, lacking of self control and just plain terrible. But I want to thank the Lord for His power is made perfect in weaknesses! (2 Corinthians 12:9) Without my God, I would be dead, literally. Because I know no one in this world would accept me for who I am. People in this world will judge you as if they're any better, which is ridiculous. The world would pretend to care for you but actually they're just finding more reasons to take you down. Whatever it is, I'm so glad and grateful that I have a God who is so true and loves me unconditionally. (: Yeay! I'm still trying very hard to be more like Jesus and less like myself! Do keep me in your prayers! (: God bless you!

Never again.

2010-11-27T03:38:00.000-06:00

Many times I've forgotten why I've chose to let him go. Whenever I'm in that "why" state, I'll never get back to my "because" state quickly. I really wish that reason why would stay with me forever. So I don't have to wonder why and why all over again. It's torturing. That, I should know. Thank God for He's always there to bring me back to the "because" state. To sum up the reason why. It's for my own good and yours too.

To you: Please do understand and take cautious in every step you're taking.

And again, Harry Potter left me hanging. Can't wait to watch the part 2 of it. (: I think my holiday would be the awesome-st ever! :D

Peace yo!

sohappy!

2010-11-24T03:18:00.000-06:00

new hair cut!

I'M DONE WITH MY FINALS! I DON'T HAVE TO ATTEND ANY BIOLOGY OR PSYCHOLOGY CLASSES ANYMORE! WOOHUU!!!!! (:

English paper was tricky. A lot of people made the same mistake but THANK GOD for my lecturer!! So the question goes something like this.. "What would a person do to overcome the loss of a friend, family OR pet." See I highlighted the 'or' word? That's the tricky part. Normally people would just write all 3 of them (friend,family,and pet), but the question stated 'or'! Which means.. you have to choose one of them to write, NOT ALL OF THEM!

I wasn't sure at first when I saw that question. Though I remember my lecturer did mention about that before, but still. So thank God, my lecturer saw that I was about to write that question, he reminded me to just choose one out of three to write!! Phew.. Or not I'll be a dead meat. (: After finals I've checked with my friends, they did the same mistake. Hopefully it'd be alright. (: PRAY!

And oh.. I've called Toefl to check again whether the test will be still on. The operator told me IT'S STILL ON, for now. Lol. Well, it's a good news for me! (:

Now I have to focus on my Toefl and of course I'll be having some fun time as well. I have to plan for my upcoming holiday too!! (:

All the best to those who are still sitting for their finals. (: Um.. I guess that's all for now! :D

Always and Forever

2010-11-23T19:26:00.000-06:00

So...

Bio was not difficult but, because I didn't memorize the important ones, I couldn't do it. =/ Oh wells.. I've tried. The rest is in God's hand now. (: Really don't want to think about it.

Today would be my last day. I'm feeling excited yet nervous for my English paper. English is like the only subject I could score A. Hopefully I could understand all the questions on the paper and make no grammar mistakes. (:

After my finals, I still have to study for Toefl. Sigh. Hopefully, Toefl will be on still, since 11th Dec is Sultan Selangor's birthday! omg. =/

I have too many things to worry about! Oh no.. Also, all the clothings' price will be increased by 50%! I thought I could shop after my finals. I guess that won't happen after all.

depressinggirlyesiamtillthen.

B-I-O

2010-11-22T20:06:00.000-06:00

"Why do I have to study Biology when I'm just going to be a preschool teacher?"

"Well, the children may ask why don't plants eat rice."

-_____-

Very stupid answer from a friend of mine but it made me smile. (:

Thank God for humorous friends around me! :D

I still have quite a number of things to memorize. I can't seem to remember them all. Sigh. I don't wanna fail!! 6 more hours to Biology paper!! omgomgomgomg..

Disease

2010-11-22T07:53:00.001-06:00

Everyone is sick during finals. Thank God I'm healthy as a horse. (: Grandma keeps vomiting. Nope, she's not pregnant. -.- To all of you out there, please pray for those who are not feeling well. (: My cousin Adeline is having fever. My friend Jason has been sick since forever. And a lot more people out there!! Do keep them in your prayer!

Owh by the way, Maths was really difficult. Now I'm worried for Biology. =/ All the best Phoebe! :D 2 more subjects to go then I'm free!! Wheee... (:

P.M.

2010-11-21T22:32:00.000-06:00

I'm officially done with Psychology!!! I wouldn't say that it's easy but I think I can get a B+. Hopefully. (: Quite happy actually. At least I know I won't fail Psycho!! :D Maths later at 5pm!! Erm.. I don't know. I really wanna get an A for maths. But I'm still blur in integration. -.- Biology tomorrow and I still haven't started memorizing anything yet. But thank God for 5pm Bio. So I still have some time to stuff everything. (: I have to take a nap so that I can calculate correctly later on! Teehee.. Continue to pray for me!!!! :D Love you all..

Finale

2010-11-20T21:09:00.000-06:00

Tomorrow is D-day! Honestly, I can't wait for it to come. (: I don't know what to expect. I've studied all that I can. Others, I guess I'll have to leave it up to God. So here's my finals' timetable. (I don't know why I want to post it up)

Monday:

Psychology 8am-10am

Maths 5pm-7pm

Tuesday:

Biology 5pm-7pm

Wednesday:

English 2pm-4pm

I love my timetable, somehow. They're so "well-planned". (: Must be God who has put them this way. HAHA. A lot of friends of mine will be free only after Friday but I can start having fun on Wednesday! WOOHUU!!! (: Gonna be a good day today! God bless you all!!

xoxo

You

2010-11-18T07:58:00.000-06:00

Just when I thought I'm the most depressing girl ever in this world, I went to this girl's blog. I feel so sad for her. I don't know why but I just do. Somehow, I'm so glad to have Jesus by my side. When things get really really rough, as in really really really rough, I realized and know that there's no one else could make me feel happier other than the Lord. (: Thank you, Lord. Thank you for the peace and joy you've put into my heart! (:

Superman

2010-11-18T05:31:00.000-06:00

"I used to think there were all these rules for making people like you. Like, the best way to get a guy to like you would be to actively ignore him. I was filled with advice! I'd tell my friends things like, 'Don't accept that apology! That isn't sincere!' But love is never that simple. Now I'm finally getting the idea it's the one thing I don't need to have a strategy for." - Taylor Swift

I felt like an idiot when I read that yesterday. Because I was keen on looking for strategies! Yes, I've just admitted it myself. I'm sure this goes out to all the girls as well. That's because girls are sentimental/sensitive/emotional and the guys are not making the statement clear, sometimes. Oh wells.. Thanks Taylor for making it so clear to me now. LOL. :p

So I came out with this theory:

"If a guy likes you, no matter how dumb or stupid or ugly or fat or you like to pick your nose in the public, he will still likes you!"

This really makes my 'job' easier in choosing the right one. Okay, I know I've been thinking too much or far far away. But prevention is better than cure! HAHA. (:

3 more days to finals.

People all around are not feeling well.

People all around are getting weirder.

Thanks to finals. Pfffft...

And I really need to stop myself from Fb-ing so much!! OMG.

study phoebe,study!

D:

2010-11-16T06:11:00.000-06:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHAO FERN! (:

5 more days to finals!!!

Still not ready.

Praise the Lord for 11/15 for my Biology test2!!

God speaks to those who take time to listen,

and He listens to those who take time to pray.

WAWA!!!

2010-11-13T20:06:00.000-06:00

8 more days to finals!

Nope. I'm not ready yet.

(:

2010-11-11T04:36:00.001-06:00

I'm back to Facebook! Because of ENL 102!! -_- Long story..

Anyway.. 10 more days to finals! I'm supposed to be super stress up now but somehow, I feel calm. Thank you, Lord! :D

Dinner! (:

Guess what, guess what?!

2010-11-10T07:26:00.000-06:00

Whenever I have a good news to share, I will start with 'guess what'. So yup, GUESS WHAT?!

:))))

I got 35/40 for my Maths test 2!! Awesome! (: Thank you, Lord.

I screwed up my test 1, thus, my total course work for Maths is 47.2/60. Bad bad.. =/ Let's pray that I could do well in my finals!! :D And I will! :D

11 days to finals. I am expecting the worst to come. I have no study break nor do I have enough time to squeeze everything into my tiny brain. It's either A- or B+, I think. So people, I know more than half of you are done with finals, PRAY FOR ME!! And also all those who will be taking their finals. (:

Back to Psychology.. =/

Realized

2010-11-08T05:19:00.000-06:00

After having my Facebook account deactivated, I feel much "lighter". I don't have to wake up thinking who would be commenting on my stuffs or to stalk on my friends, literally. (: It's fun, really. I realized I have much more time now. :D So I've been doing these to replace Facebook! Yes, I sewed them all by myself! Cute right? (: Thanks to my cousin! She's da bomb! :D

I've been watching some Korean dramas too! :D Ok.. I feel kind of lifeless now.. .. but it's fun, really! :)))) Alright, time for maths! Boo... Test tomorrow! All the best, Phoebe! (:

PRAY FOR A BETTER GENERATION!

2010-11-05T09:27:00.000-05:00

I've just heard from a friend of mine that xxxx just got married because of pregnancy. I feel sad for her. I mean nobody wants to get pregnant when she's 18!!

And so friends, why not start praying for our generation! Pray for a change! That less or NO premarital sex would happen! And guys, when you're horny please pray to God. LOL. Girls, learn to say no before it's too late. Anyone of us can be the 'victim'. Persevere people! Persevere!!

God is glorified!

2010-11-01T08:08:00.000-05:00

There's always this doubt following me wherever I go. The doubt of being not good enough. Just so you know, I can't swim, cycle, play the piano or so. I can sing but well, everyone can sing right? So I was really angry when people start to say others are better than me, indirectly. I thought I am really good in nothing. Why for some, they can be so good academically and have extra talents? For me, all I have is.. .. er.. myself?

I want to thank God for this friend of mine who has always been there for me. :) And he told me this, "Do u know God does not leave you all alone when you do something to glorify him? When you wanna sing for Him, if it's pure talent people will praise you but not him; when you sing and ask for the spirit to anoint you, where you depend not on yourself but the power he provides, people will praise the name of Jesus because they know it's not you."

So what he's trying to say is that, we may have a lot of talents, but we're having it not to show off or to impress people. God has given us all these so that we could glorify His name! :)

Many times, the devil would play with our minds by these little things. Instead thinking of what you don't have, think of what has God done in your life and praise God for that! Pastor had mentioned during the previous service on giving glory to God and not just for the benefits of us.

Thank you Lord for giving me a beautiful voice that people always praise about!

Thank you Lord for giving me a sense of fashion that people always admire!

Thank you Lord for giving me a proportioned body! LOL.

Thank you Lord for giving me so many pretty clothes! WOOHUU! :)

-Don't try to impress people who don't care about you!

bubble!

2010-11-01T03:49:00.000-05:00

EW!

i know.

-.-

more 'excuse' for me to wear slippers to college!

and pedicure too!

my toes are dying.

thank you, heels.

2010-10-25T08:13:00.001-05:00

HI LAVYNNIA!! :D

cute right my cousin's dog! omg.

Ok.. I'm bored. :p

maybe i should study now!

Lol.

Psycho test tmr!

All the best phoebe!

WOOHUU!!

*run around the room*

HI MEI MEI ADALIA! :D

2010-10-24T03:16:00.000-05:00

study la phoebe!!

STUDY!

HAHA..

2010-10-21T19:46:00.000-05:00

Toefl

2010-10-19T08:30:00.000-05:00

For those who do not know, I will be taking my Toefl test on the 11th of Dec, 2010. And unfortunately, it so happen to be Sultan Selangor's birthday! I really don't want any delay in taking the test! So please pray for me that the Toefl test will be still on no matter what!!

Please pray for my upcoming tests, presentations, and also finals!!

THANK YOU..

Today is the day!

2010-10-18T05:16:00.000-05:00

Everyday is indeed the day for us to go for Jesus. Today had lunch with this friend of mine and he actually asked me about how to pray etc etc. Gotta be prepared every single day to glorify His name! Amen? :)

Anyway.. I think I had diarrhea!!! ): Pray for me please. Thank you! :D

Willing

2010-10-16T09:43:00.000-05:00

Recently, pastors keep emphasizing "willingness" in the church. I don't know if anyone else in the church felt the same thing too. But yeah.. It's quite obvious that God is searching for somebody who is willing to lay down everything and serve Him. I'm pretty sure it's not a easy thing to do and I'm very sure that if we are willing to serve Him, we can see amazing stuff happening in our lives! :D

So.. Are you ready to serve the Lord? :)

Amazing Grace

2010-10-14T23:12:00.000-05:00

Ok.. I don't know why did I entitled this post as 'Amazing Grace' but yeah.. Just as I've promised on the earlier post, I will write about something awesome that has happened yesterday.

So on the 12th of Oct, Tuesday, my friend asked me for my Toefl book and I decided to borrow it to her since well.. She's a really good friend to me. And on that night when I was doing my devotion, I felt that God wanted me to pray for her, as in go to her personally and pray. I wasn't sure at that time if it was the right thing to do. I was thinking, " She's a Christian wert, I don't think she needs my prayer. "

The next day when I passed the book to her, I wanted to pray for her actually, but it wasn't the right time to do so because the place where we were meeting was a very hectic place. So I didn't pray for her. I thought maybe I was thinking too much during my devotion.

Thursday, we had Maths class together and that was when God reassured me again that He really wants me to pray for her. My friend told me, out of sudden, that she's so worried about her Toefl test which is coming up on this Sunday. I told her that I would pray for her after the class but she thought I was going to pray for her when I'm back home.

So anyway, long story short, after the class, before I pray for her she told me, " Ey.. Nobody has ever pray for me like that before (as in personally), not even at the church." At that moment, I know I was doing the right thing by praying for her and most important thing is that God did spoke to me that night when I was doing my devotion. How awesome is that! :D

You can ignore or even forget about the story above. My main point of posting this up is not to tell you how awesome I am to be able to hear from God but to say that my God is the most gracious and wonderful God I ever have. Even I am not worthy to be called His child, He still care and speak to me. :) God can and will use everybody but that is if you are willing to open your heart to Him! :)

Food for thought : Have you been sensitive to God's voice? Are you aware of what's happening around you? Do you know any friends that are in need of God right now? START PRAYING AND GIVE THANKS TO GOD FOR EVERYTHING YOU HAVE/ HAD/ ARE HAVING!

⁹But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."

2 Corinthians 12:9 (NIV)

"Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path." Psalm 119:105 (NIV)

love sick?!

2010-10-14T10:39:00.000-05:00

I think I'm having a sore throat! ):

Don't like it at all.

Can't talk so much anymore.

Oh wells..

Something awesome happened today though. :)

I will definitely share it on the next post! :D

Boink! FAT!

2010-10-13T07:34:00.000-05:00

I miss ice cream and winter!

Be ME!

2010-10-11T03:54:00.000-05:00

This site makes me wanna dress up nicely everyday. :)

My cousin once asked me, " Why can't we dress up like the Japanese in Malaysia? If we do, why must we be categorized as 'lala'? "

I've thought about that too. Malaysians or rather Chinese are so afraid to be called 'lala'. Some of us dress like the Japanese doesn't mean we are 'lala'. It's just who we are or rather we are fashionable!

So don't afraid to dress up nicely. Get out of that 'lala' mentality and be who you wanna be! :) Being fashionable doesn't mean you are 'lala'!! Wearing casual is just too common for cool people like us! :p

Instead of a (oh-so-boring) tshirt and shorts, why not put on a vest to glam yourself up. Also add on a cool hat on yourself. :) With your comfy sneakers and a bag. There you go. All new and different. :)

Mind you, I wear differently everyday in college. To not only make myself look good but to have that "this-is-me" confidence. :D And when people starting to praise my fashion sense, I will feel so proud of myself. Like well.. At least I've achieve something in life! HAHA.

2010-10-05T06:47:00.000-05:00

Owh btw.. Just now during the Maths class I was so devastated that I actually said, " I think I'm born to be a failure. No matter how hard I study, I will never get A. " But thank God for a friend of mine who said this to me, " Ey.. Don't simply say ah.. God created you for a purpose k.. blalalala.. " Well.. Maybe I have to work harder! Like my Maths lecturer said, " You don't expect to get an A when you just study for an hour. " True enough. A doesn't come easily! I have to sacrifice my time and stuff!! Ok. Study time! :)))))

Machine gun..

2010-10-05T06:32:00.000-05:00

So I got back my Psychology and Maths results. Not satisfying at all. Which means I have to study harder!! Sigh.. I really want to get all A's. At least for this semester.

Pray for me please and of course I will do my very very very best!!

I will cut down on Facebook. :) Pinky promise!

Kaching $$$

2010-10-04T02:08:00.000-05:00

Today is a surprisingly blessed day. :)

God has actually blessed me financially today! Woohuu.. I can shop already!! :))))))

It's like a lot of time I have doubt on how much to give for offering but when I just give to God generously, He blessed me back more than 5 times the amount! :D

So grateful to have a rich God like Him. hahaha..

Morning Glory

2010-10-02T21:04:00.000-05:00

Such a beautiful flower don't you think so?

Ok.. I want this type of flower for my wedding next time.

hahaha..

But that's if they are not extinct at that time? :p

SHOPPING!

2010-10-02T01:05:00.000-05:00

I SERIOUSLY NEED TO SHOP! I'VE BEEN LIVING HERE FOR WAY TOO LONG! UGH.. I miss shopping! I need to get more dresses and be like Taylor Swift!! :)

I AM FREE!!

2010-09-25T09:58:00.000-05:00

Today, pastor talked about the Miracle of Forgiveness. It was an awesome sermon. Even during the praise and worship session, I felt God's presence. It was so tender. :D Just plain awesome feeling. Mind you, I was sitting far far away from the altar/stage, yet God's presence just filled the place. :] God is everywhere!!

" Forgiving is not simply an act, it's an attitude. "

I love it when the pastor said, "You'd forgive and say sorry to the person you're holding grudge on, it's not because he/she is worth it, but because you're doing that for yourself."

Yes. We're forgiving people because we are supposed to be Christ-like and also because if we forgive others, God will forgive us too. So how many times would you want God to forgive you? Is it every time when you ask for forgiveness from God? Well then.. Do the same. It's not easy to forgive somebody. ( I would know that too) But it's for our own good. :D

Pastor ended the sermon by saying that we should start saying sorry. To the our mom, dad, cousins, friends and whoever we're holding grudge on ; though they may have started it all.

And after the service, I feel so light as if all my burdens are away. I don't feel that heaviness in my heart anymore! (if you know what i mean)

PRAISE THE LORD!

Praise the Lord!

2010-09-23T21:22:00.001-05:00

YES PEOPLE!! I HAVE DONE MY TOEFL APPLICATION LIKE FINALLY!! WOOHUU!! :D

ok.. so things to worry about now.

- Psychology assignment

- Biology assignment

- Exam and exam

BEST GOD EVA!!

2010-09-22T10:11:00.000-05:00

Everything seemed fine until some error has occurred to my application for Toefl.

-_______-

I don't really want to talk about it or to remind myself of what the tut has happened.

Instead of blaming God for not helping me, I want to thank the Lord for my previous test results. Though they weren't as high as some of my friends but I'm satisfied. :)

8.5/15 for Biology. 23.75/25 for English.

:)))))))

Praise the Lord!

Things aren't really going well or maybe they're not going according to what I've expected it to be right now. There's nothing that I can do about it other than to pray and be still. This is the verse that came across my mind when I was feeling very frustrated.

"Be still, and know that I am God.." (Psalm 46:10)

Yes Phoebe, be still. :)

And also.. Tzi Ying messaged me when I was all down just now. Saying that she's facing all kinds of troubles right now but she said that she would be strong. That message really encouraged me in some way, to be strong no matter what I'm facing and eventually, God will make a way for me! :D

God will make a way when there's seemed to be no way.

He works in way, we cannot see.

He will make a way for me.

He will be my light, holds me closely to His side.

food for thought

2010-09-19T07:13:00.000-05:00

Somehow.. I dropped by to Karyn Lee's (Chun Jui's girlfriend) blog. And all that I could think of is that.. 'man.. i don't think i've been so madly in love in my life before.' Like seriously.. I don't think I remember how it feels like to lose someone I love so badly. Hurmm..

Anyway.. I LOVE JESUS!! Ahaha.. Random. But I really do. I just feel so damn complete. :D I'll be getting my results soon. Expecting to get like supa low marks. So... Work harder, Phoebe! :)

Monkey!

money-deprived

2010-09-19T05:43:00.000-05:00

I really want them all!!

Now you know what to give me on my birthday right?

scoopy-doo

2010-09-17T08:04:00.000-05:00

Ok.. I'll be gone (dead) for putting up the last post. But everyone has his rights kayy.. Hurmm..

Anyway friends, 2 more days then i'll be heading back to college. Not motivated at all but still have to go. At least I won't procrastinate so much. :p So.. Pray for me. I know I did badly for my last tests thus I gotta be more hardworking now!! No fooling around anymore, Phoebe. :)

And oh.. I'm planning to go back to KK, Sabah end of this year, what do you think? :D Since I'll be going off to U.S. next year August. Hurmm.. Pray for this too. :)

Ok.. Time to study! :))))

Hi Ivan! :p

Rawr!

2010-09-17T07:45:00.000-05:00

hi.. :p

just want to say bai bai to Timothy Lee.

(if somehow he's here reading this) lol

thank you for every happy and not-so-happy things/moments.

have a safe flight back to UK.

i know i won't be in the list of "things you'd missed the most",

but wth i'll definitely miss you! :)

take care!!

Motivate me!

2010-09-15T20:55:00.000-05:00

Yes.. I need motivation to study. I've been wasting too much time watching anime, worrying bout my upcoming tests (without doing anything bout it), making myself pretty etc.

Ugh..

Study la Phoebe! Study!!

-_____-

Dance! :D

2010-09-08T23:29:00.000-05:00

Me

2010-09-07T04:50:00.000-05:00

I've always wanted to be more like Jesus and less like me but IT'S REALLY SO DAMN DIFFICULT! I've tried to not gossip or be judgmental yet I failed to do that. It's like I'm going back to Form1 all over again. Oh noo.. This is bad. I guess I should care less about whatever is happening around me and instead focus on my studies!

If you have nothing to pray for..

Pray for me!

1. That I'll be less judgmental and be more like Jesus!!

2. I'll finish up my assignments and study like mad!

3. I'll passed my test with flying colors!

YAY!

Thanks..

2010-09-02T22:04:00.000-05:00

Loving this song! :)

Enjoy!

Bruise

2010-09-01T05:54:00.000-05:00

Today is not a very happy day for me. The fact that I still can't use my brain properly to memorize for my tests. I've screwed my Psychology test. And when I said I've screwed it, I really did. Out of 10%, I think I'll just get like a 3%. I didn't have the appetite to eat after the test and really just faked a smile the whole day. I'm just so tired of exams. Though I've spent time to study and all, it seems like I will never get there. I really did my best. I did. But I guess it was not enough. Another 'stab' to my heart. ):

Anyway.. Saw this line from an email sent by Lavynnia. It was quite a long email and not one of the lines touch me except for this..

'He keeps me functioning each and every day. Without Him, I will be nothing. But, with Christ, HE strengthens me.'

Christ strengthens me when I'm worn out mentally and physically. I know there's nothing I can do about the Psychology test. I have to move on and put more effort next time.

Till then.. <3

Psycho me

2010-08-29T02:33:00.000-05:00

Study is never my thing. I mean I love to go to school or college but I don't like the fact that I have to study. LOL. Psychology is really killing me. I like the subject but it's really impossible for me to read all four chapters (159pages) in two days. I don't have the confident that I can score well in this test. It's not that I don't want to be optimistic, I'm just looking into the reality. Sigh. But college life would be meaningless if there's no any tests right? So I guess I have to bear with it. I'll study as much as possible. The rest, well, just leave it up to God.

Verses that keep me motivated and surely I will hold on to His promises:

".. faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead."

(James 2:17)

"..With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible."

(Matthew 19:26)

Amen and amen.

Stay

2010-08-16T06:46:00.000-05:00

" Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed. "

(Proverbs 16 : 3)

There are thousands and millions of reasons why I would want to get out of this world. Hurts, betrayals, disappointments etc. Sometimes I feel worn out and really really tired of all that nonsense. Thank God that He has always been faithful and so damn good to me. :D

F.Y.I, my English lecturer is really a pita and if you're not up to his standard then you'll fail terribly. So yeah.. I got two 'EXCELLENT's for my journal writing which is awesome!! Seriously, thank God! Hahahahaha.. I didn't expect that at all. Wuah... :) I know. hahah.

Though life is really really difficult for me, but my God is always there, making sure that everything would just turn out fine. :) More challenges to come which means more miracles too! Yeshhhh! Muahahaha... Come on baybehh! I'm so ready for it! :D

2010-08-15T19:59:00.000-05:00

Happy.

Happiee.

Hairpee.

HehP.

Woohuuu

2010-08-03T06:02:00.000-05:00

This is a 'thank-God' post :

Thank God for He has provided me awesome friends at the college. Some seniors there are so good to me. I actually got my Biology text book from a senior for free! :D And Eza (senior) gave me 10 of her lab reports just like that! Oh my Lord.

I was wondering if there's any gathering for ICF (Inti Christian Fellowship) this week and thank God for sending two seniors to let me know about it! :D So happy!! Muahaha..

Can't wait for more miracles to happen in my life! Yay!

:)

IloveJesus!